January 5, 2012. Today is my birthday, therefore I get to do and write whatever I want. That is rule of birthdays - in fact, you should not have to work and if you do, it should only be under the condition that your gang take you to lunch (extended of course) and they have a birthday cake for you and everyone gets a piece.
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| Russian Orthodox Cross Tattoo |
I love this time of year, for obvious reasons. From Thanksgiving straight through to my birthday, it's the holiday season. In fact, growing up in the Russian Orthodox tradition, "our" Christmas was celebrated two weeks, give or take, after the regular American December 25th holiday, so we got to celebrate twice. If I remember, it always fell on a Sunday. And shortly thereafter, each January, the priest would make a visit and bless our home. It was a very big deal. He would come in with all his religious church regalia, altar boy assistant along side him, and sprinkle oblations throughout the house. He presence was profound. Everyone was on high spiritual alert. And by everyone, I mean me, my mother and father. My siblings who were still living at home were usually not there; they were teenagers, who found some reasonable excuse to be busy with friends. I didn't understand how one would not want to be there. I often felt that those annual visits by our church priest was what kept our somewhat fragmented family together. And the tossing of holy water, the remainder of which was gifted to us and stored in the pantry for the year, all over the walls and furniture, protected us from the unpredictability of life. I actually felt he should have made a monthly visit. I was always nervous that the once-a-year thing was too sparse, that the blessing would wear off.
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| Russian Orthodox Priest |
Officially, for yours truly, the holiday season ends on January 6th. As we get older the date doesn't have the impact it did when we were younger. I am usually excited about January 5th, but I see I have changed. Time and my attachment to it is different. The more I meditate and find myself in the now moment, the less that the time/space parameters dictate my frame of mind. I spend an enormous amount of time by myself, though not alone. I am slightly aware of a few things that I wasn't say, a year ago or even six months ago. I am more aware that I am a spiritual being having a human experience. When I forget, or should I say when I remember, it is a very simple matter of just putting my mind there, a matter of shifting perception, or even consciousness, remembering what I really am, and that is soul or spirit or light. The other kind of thinking that I am more willing to embrace more often is that I am a part of Source, or God or Creator or Universe. I come from there, I was created from that and I am returning to that. This is a journey of wisdom, of trials, of realizations, of questions, of ecstasies, of paths that undulate within and around a wondrously creative landscape -- internal and external -- that never ever gets boring or tedious or old so long as our third eye remains open.
It, the path, my path, is about a fully wakeful meditation. Or more like a continual remembrance of what is real. In Sanskrit the expression is Neti Neti which means not this, not this. This world is not real, only God is real. It is taken from the Raja Yoga tradition and implies that by negating the illusion, the Maya, we will put ourselves in touch with Truth and Reality. The mind, like the world, is the training ground for the Yogi. It's about subduing the mind and detaching from sense objects, thereby thinning out the constant barrage of mental fluctuations which are the cause of suffering. But I digress. The topic is enormous and is in fact one of the basic tenets of the Upanishads.
As the energies of the Ascension increase and change and charge our bodies and minds, our cellular structure and even our DNA, we begin to sensing the SHIFT. It's real, it's here and it is our ticket home. It has created within me, and many others, a peacefulness, an awareness of a divine presence, a heightened perception of "otherness" whether it be God or humanity, and it's created nothing. Nothingness. A fearlessness of nothingness. It's a process (often extremely uncomfortable and misunderstood) of emptying ourselves of ego, attachment and fear. When the nothing happens, something else of a much grander dimension rushes in to fill the void. It is inexplicable. And when you begin tapping into it (for lack of a better expression, and most of them are lacking) and experience what this is, you just want more and more. And all you need is a tiny bit, a glimpse, a peek into what you are inside, beyond the boundaries of the world, to keep you asking for more.
Thus, the date of my birth, though acknowledged with gratitude, is...well, just is. Human birth, according to Hindus, is an amazing and precious gift. To take human form is extremely rare and therefore sacred. The time the soul spends in the body is to be honored and respected because it is the perfect chance to walk the path to enlightenment. It is while we spend time on the planet that we have been granted the opportunity to gain knowledge of BOTH the universe and what animates it. And that knowledge is there for the asking, on our birthday and all the other days of our life.
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