The Truth Behind the Virus
My computer caught a bug and was quickly rendered inoperable. It is such a yucky thing to have to go through, and it is not cheap getting it back up and running. I do have a wonderful fix-it shop only a few blocks away who charge incredibly reasonable rates to get one back on line - what a blessing. I have been away since Saturday afternoon at about 5 p.m., so technically it's four days, but only three full days if you count only Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. But it feels like ten days - being out of touch with my cyber community was, well, a little lonely. Not just that, there is now tons of catching up - three days away from my alternative news sources, channeled messages and funny memes is a long time. If I had stayed away deliberately, as I've done on occasion, it wouldn't feel so long. But the fact that it happened to me gives it a whole different spin.
Which brings me to the point I want to make. When this first happened, when the sudden realization that I would be offline for a solid three or four days, I thought, okay, good, there is something in this for me and I actually looked forward to seeing what was going to unfold in the interim. By the next morning I knew that there was not going to be some deep insight waiting to be grasped or another level of spiritual understanding that I was supposed to have. Nope. I had to wait it out and make the most of a bunch of free time. So I read - a lot. In fact, due to the recent visit by MAX the crystal skull, I went out and got The Mystery of the Crystal Skulls by Chris Morton and Ceri Louise Thomas. It's actually very good and reads like a detective story, filled with suspense and intrigue.
So, I did a lot of walking around the City, met up with friends and rode the Staten Island Ferry - twice. (It was a nice day). I managed not to worry about not being on line. In fact, that was more of a surprise to me than expected. I really thought I would be itching to be back and chatting and surfing and reading and commenting. But no, not really. I thought for sure I would be heading over to the cyber cafe to at least troll the blogs for an hour just to get my fix. No, again. I do feel responsible to my readers, certainly, and I naturally sense you all wondering what happened. Did I follow MAX home to Texas? Did I finally run off to the ashram, shave my head and become a Swami? Did I ascend? None of those, obviously. I did, however, live my life in real time and got another perspective.
It has been crossing my mind lately as to how I would feel if I did go to India, for example, and didn't have my daily dose of computer time, to which I feel I have become terribly attached. Those are the kinds of things that scare me, when the mind becomes dependent on "stuff", "things", "busy-ness". Of course I was irritated at first, and still was the next day, when I couldn't come back to the blog and talk about my experience with MAX. Sometime around the second day, I was feeling okay with not being on line and took it (and a broken computer) in stride. Wow, well this is new, I thought. And I wasn't pretending to not have it bother me; it really wasn't bothering me! So I resisted the natural inclination to find a computer to rent and carried on as though it were a different time. By yesterday afternoon I knew the computer was going to be fine and that they had retrieved all my data. Whew, close one. So I relaxed.
I relaxed enough to maybe have a chat with my higher self, or my guides, or calling in whatever might come through. I had to do a little digging this time. I have been feeling clearer these days. In the past, as I was moving through more treacherous territory, communicating with them was easier. I think because the emotions were more piqued, closer to the surfacce. But now, feeling less needy and more centered, I wasn't sure if I had anything to ask. (Wait...there is always something to ask.) I was tired of reading, I had no one to talk to and I don't own a T.V. so I took out my notebook and closed my eyes. As usual, I was trying to step aside, and I wasn't sure it was working. Then something started to resonate.
They talked to me for a bit and then it stopped. There was a pause. For whatever reason, it popped into my mind to ask them if they broke my computer!! Well, it couldn't hurt; I wanted to know why that happened. Mind you, I am not in the habit of asking questions, it makes me a little uncomfortable. This is how that conversation went:
They were finishing up on a topic with, "Today you are more blank, which is more difficult, requiring a more refined connection to us. You've not been here in a while". Then I just blurted it out.
Me: Did you break my computer?
Answer: No.
Again I asked, I figured I should ask three times to be sure.
Me: Did you break my computer?
Answer: Maybe.
That was weird, but at least we were getting somewhere. For a second I felt like I was having a conversation with a mischievous younger sibling. Now I had to take my time with the final question, because I have to be sure I am not projecting and that I am getting a clear signal.
Me: Did you...?
Answer: You were asking to see what it would be like to be in complete silence and not have the machine around. You were afraid if you did go to a place off the grid that you would be restless to be online, etc. and therefore become distracted from your time there. We were just showing you what you wanted to know. So we had to accommodate your inquiry. The only way to do that was to shut it down for 3 or 4 days because we saw you weren't going to do it for yourself. So did we "break" your computer? No. We did, however, take it temporarily out of commission.
How's that for celestial diplomacy?
With lots of love,
Sharda
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